Every time I hear people talking about gender inequality, I get angry. I think to myself, c’mon people, it’s 2023 for Christ’s sake! Why are we still making women cover up their tits in public? Men don’t have to, they can go almost anywhere bare chested, so why not women?

Regardless of whether the law suddenly changed and became less strict on this issue, I suspect many women would still continue to cover up their breasts with fabric, but I do think it should be their choice. Why did we ever insist that they cover them up in the first place? Was it just some societal construct based on a religiously fueled sense of modesty? Or was it a more practical concern, like to avoid them getting sunburned or constantly getting snagged on things? Maybe it’s a bit of both. I honestly don’t know, I’m seriously asking. I don’t find women’s tits attractive, so I don’t care either way (actually, I’d probably prefer they stayed covered up…) but if it isn’t for some health issue, then in the name of equality, I think we should allow women the freedom to decide for themselves. If it is your preference, Ladies, then everywhere that men go shirtless, like the jogging trail, public pools, the beach, the park, etc., you should be able to take off all your upper garments, too. Remember: allowing special privileges to some but not others does not equality make!

Likewise, on every major dating sites, why is it that they’ve removed all the racial preference filters, but still give people the ability to discriminate based on gender? How dare they!

If we are going to pretend that all people are attracted to all ethnicities equally—and it is now considered racist to acknowledge any predilections whatsoever in that area—then shouldn’t we also force everyone to look at the profiles of all genders? To make sure no one’s being homophonic or misogynistic with their own private romantic preferences?

Straight men can see if they like sifting through allllllllllll the tasteless and erotic photos of homosexual guys each day when they open up their inbox, but of course, we’ll need to force the gay men to look at female profiles, too. Allowing guys to specify that they only like other guys, well, that’s just misogyny outright, and needs to be stopped! We’ll end racism, homophobia, and misogyny all in one fell swoop, right here, on dating websites, by forcing people to look at other people they aren’t remotely attracted to. In fact, in addition to removing all the ethnicity filters, we should remove all filters of any kind, and waste everyone’s time, all because of some misguided notion that we need to appear completely unbiased in our romantic pursuits. Geez.

Before you say this sounds like a terrible idea, Straight Men, don’t forget that under my new equality proposal, all the women are encouraged to have their tits exposed. You know, for equality. So there’s that…

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A Serious Addendum

Hey— Dating Website Gurus: Did it ever occur to you that after the “Me Too” movement, ladies might like a way to filter out all the old white guys? Or were you just so afraid that someone might be so un-woke as to try and filter out a black or brown ethnicity? Seriously. If you’ve already predetermined which things are okay to prefer and which ones aren’t, are they even really my preferences anymore?

With all the overcorrection that was starting to happen, I was waiting to sign in one day and have Grindr tell me, “Sorry, your request for gay men is denied…rerouting…. You will now be shown a selection of Empowered Black Females, the only politically correct choice at this time.”

An Enormous Addendum/Fun Fact:

In Italy, they love their gigantic, exposed breasts. An when I say gigantic...

I mean, you haven't really lived until you've stood next to a ginormous nipple, larger than the size of your face.